Oh, Lulu… Maybe fortune telling isn’t your thing.
Because Single, again is unscripted, I never really know what to expect. During the taping of season one, Josie suggested I ask Lulu the Psychic (too good not to pair!) about my love life.
This should be good, I thought. I don’t have a love life and I’m not looking for one. What could go wrong?
Turns out? A lot. I just never expected it to go off the rails so fast.
Spoiler alert: Details ahead from my session with Lulu the Psychic. If you’re waiting for the podcast reveal, you might want to skip to the end.
Before I roast my reading, I’ll give Lulu this: phoning it in can’t be easy for psychics. There’s no body language. No energy to read. No encouraging nod that says, ‘Yes, you’re on the right track.”
Here’s where I may have stumped Lulu. I may lean masc in person, but over the phone? Apparently, I radiate femme — because Lulu proceeded to tell me I’d be dating a wealthy (wait for it) man.
And soon.
My marriage to a woman may have ended in disaster, but I’m not sure that rises to the level of switching teams midseason. There’s only one problem: I’m into women.
Awkward.
Lulu quickly pivoted. Masculine energy sometimes comes through as male, she corrected. Or some other bullshit.
We all laughed — including Lulu.
The thing that gets me, though, is that Lulu wasn’t reading me — she was reading from a cultural script. One where love looks a certain way. Behaves a certain way. One where women crave romance, chase riches and wait to be rescued.
And isn’t that the problem?
Here’s the thing: What if that’s not what I’m looking for?
Sure, this psychic reading was cheeky and fun and entertaining as hell. I never took it seriously. I didn’t because I’m not looking for someone outside myself to complete me. But sadly, so many of us are.
Still, I couldn’t help but wonder: what happens when we stop chasing the script and start writing our own?
This Lulu story sticks around. The rest don’t. To catch new ones before they slip away, subscribe to Stay Waterproof.
© 2025 Brayton River Works | All rights reserved
Join the couch 